I am a glass is half empty kind of gal and my friend Macey is a glass half full girl. She wants to see the best in people and believes a lot of what she is told. I am skeptical to the bone, especially with people I barely know and to be perfectly honest, it has served me fairly well over the years. I do not consider myself naïve or easily deceived and maybe because of Macey’s good nature, she has been duped a time or two in the land of dating.
People can be whomever they choose to be online and on the phone. A guy (or girl) can come across as charming and full of whit on the phone and then when you actually meet, you are left wondering where that person has gone. What you think will be a great date turns into a silenced filled, wish I would have worn stretch pants, hope I never told him where I live debacle. It happens to the best of us. I told Macey from the beginning that she should never talk or email longer than a week. If things are not progressing and he isn’t asking you out, it just isn’t going to happen. We have deemed this type of man, the Lazy Dater. He wants to send random emails for a while, and then he might want to go crazy and actually talk on the phone. If he is really lackadaisical, he will move into texting as a form of communication and before you know it weeks will have gone by and you still haven’t even met him.
There are of course exceptions to every rule. There is also the overeager crowd who wants to talk right away and then stalks you. He calls at all hours and doesn’t leave a message, finds you online and wants to know if you are avoiding him. Then there is an entire category of mankind that should not, under any circumstance be trying to date at all.
Macey met a gentleman on a dating website and had great conversations with him. He seemed relatively normal and they got along quite well. They finally met for coffee and things were going well until he dropped the mother of all bombs. He had something that he wanted to tell her but, he couldn’t do it face to face and was going to go home and write her an email…the biggest red flag ever. They hugged and kissed (another faux pas …never kiss on the first “meet” date) and as soon as she got in her car she called me. We analyzed the shit out this one. Having a vivid imagination is not always a good thing and there is no way we could have ever seen this one coming. It turns out that he was a registered sex offender. He had been arrested and convicted of “flashing” young girls and women. I wish it had been as trivial as he portrayed it to be. I won’t get into all of the details but, he was doing more than flashing and it was premeditated.
Macey was pretty devastated but not nearly as much as I was when she told me she had to think about the situation…whether she wanted to see him again. He played it so he was the victim and being the sweet natured gal that she is, she wanted to believe him. Thankfully she reclaimed her brain and has not seen or heard from this maniac again.
The moral to this story? Skepticism is not a bad thing and never kiss on the first date; you have no idea where that other person has been.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment